Dear Abby: Family won’t spend holiday with sex offender
The below is some rather ignorant advise from “Dear Abby”
DEAR ABBY: I have a nephew who is a Level III sex offender. My mom wants him at her house for the holidays, but none of the other family members plan to attend with their kids if he’s there.
Mom insists we should forgive him and can’t understand how people can’t forgive him for molesting children in his family. I don’t understand how my mom thinks it should be easy for us to forgive, but I feel bad for what she’s going through. She feels like her family is being torn apart. How can I help her understand that I see both sides of it? What should I do? — TORN APART
DEAR TORN: Go online and print out the definition of a Level III or Tier III sex offender so your mother can read it. These individuals are considered the most dangerous and most likely to reoffend. While at some point your relatives may be able to forgive your nephew for what he did, to ignore it could be dangerous for their children. Although you didn’t mention the conditions under which he is out of prison, he may no longer be allowed to be in the presence of minors, because if he’s caught, he might have to go back in.
Perhaps Abby should go online and print out recidivism research and read it!
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My hope is that the grandmother here will be the example for the rest of her family to eventually follow. I’ve seen families torn apart by unforgiving attitudes, and it is a path that is hard to reverse. Years from now they may wish that they had done things differently, but it is always too late.
For what it is worth, I commented on her page.
I have a recent “family” story to share in regards to the holidays. Perhaps I will post it later.
Abby should also look up “unconditional love” and “forgiveness” because this has nothing to do with the kids. Just some more people getting away with behaving badly “in the name of the kids.”